It’s my birthday. These are 8 lessons I’ve learned in the past year.

Deena Al Jassasi
4 min readJan 24

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1) Learn how to listen to your gut.

One of the best ways to manipulate a person is by having them solely use their logical or emotional mind. Always navigate from a place of wisdom and listen to your body when it says no and feels unsafe.

2) Their judgment is a reflection of themselves.

People tend to judge you based on themselves. If they admire you, then it’s probably something they admire or aspire about themselves. If they critique you, especially unconstructively, then it’s probably something they critique about themselves.

3) Concentrate on the ‘what’, not the ‘how’.

Often in life, we place barriers upon ourselves and blame it upon the world. If you want something, go for it. You’ll figure out the route along the way. Don’t let the confusing and ambitious nature of the ‘how’ get into the way of your ‘what’.

4) Fail, well.

If you’re not failing, you’re not moving. The key is to fail well and to fail quickly. Learn how to lick your wounds and move on. And, if anyone points out your failure, feel free to point out their stagnation – because, if you’re not going forward, you’re going backwards.

5) Negative visualization and purging is your bestfriend.

When your mind is mentally looping, on repeat, due to an injustice or negative experience. Feel free to use your imagination to express the negativity, that you would socially punished for doing so. However, be extremely careful to distinguish fantasy from reality.

6) As you ascend in light, you will attract more dark.

Spiritual enlightenments are phenomenal; however, they come with the responsibility of an elevated battle, the next level war, of good against bad. As you continue upon the path of righteousness, the forces of darkness will elevate. Be prepared to meet unprecedented darkness, but never forget, that you are the light.

7) Conflict is inevitable, fight with integrity.

Stand and express your truth. There will be those whom correct you, for your greater good, out of love and genuinely. Those people are rare and keep those people close. Nourish them, love them, care for them, protect them. However, the majority of others will counter and fight with you, for the sake and reflection of their insecurity and ignorance. Consider them noise, that you ought to pay small and slight attention to once, for the sake of open-mindedness. After all, a broken clock is right twice a day. Nonetheless, remember that they are noise, and noise that is meant to distract you and bring you down. If they attempt to harm you or cross over your boundaries, you have every right to protect yourself – so, protect yourself and do it well.

8) Bravery and risk-taking will be rewarded. Just do it.

Have you ever watched an excellent movie where everything went right for the main character? No, because it does not exist. That would be a boring film. Similarly, for one to live a legendary life, they ought to be brave and take risks. Calculated risks. So, be brave and keep going, and remember, your downfalls are merely plot-twists.

9) Energy vampires exist, cut off their supply.

Investing time into people ought carry a return. If you’re investing a substantial amount of time into a person and you find that they do not bring out your best, as in, the return is negative or close to nill – cut them off. You are the priority and time is something you can never recover. It is one of the most important forms of energy.

10) Surround yourself with people who’s lives you wish to live.

The best way to learn a language is by immersing yourself within that language. You’re surrounded by it at all times. Similarly, the people you surround yourself with are vital. They will feed into your subconscious. Their strengths will strengthen you, their fears will hinder you. So, choose the people that have gone through the paths that you wish to cross and ensure that you provide something valuable in return.

11) Brainwash your psyche with possibility.

You’re not as complicated as you think. You know that voice in your head that says you can’t do it? Well, that voice was learned, internalized and fully installed into your psyche. Similarly, you can install a different voice in your head – one that says that you can do whatever you set your mind too. Drown yourself with the information you wish your subconscious would speak to you. Embrace healthy delusion. When your limiting beliefs rise, tackle them, one by one, with examples based on actual reality. This will solidify the mental installation and solidify the brainwashing.

12) Advocate for yourself, you are your best ally, friend, lawyer, everything.

If you don’t believe and trust in yourself, it will be extremely hard to navigate the world. You will crush and ruin yourself, with doubt and rumination, before the world had the chance to do it. You could be your worse enemy because you know exactly how to destroy you. Even worse, in a subtle subconscious way. But, you could also be the best ally, friend, lawyer. Love yourself. Care for yourself. Trust yourself. This wont happen overnight, however consider it a skill that you ought to build and train. So, train self love, respect and advocacy – every day and watch yourself transform into the best you – you could be.

Feel free to reach out to become the best you – you could be.

Love,

Deena x

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Deena Al Jassasi

Building a mentally healthier tech tomorrow Brainz.Health. Creator of ‘The Guide To Hacking Your Psyche’: psychology, warfare + spirituality.