Box Feminism

Deena Al Jassasi
3 min readNov 22, 2022

We like to place people in mental boxes. It’s how we socialize. It’s how we make sense of the world. We place ourselves in boxes. Labelling ourselves by our beliefs, occupations, world-views and relationship status.

Oh, you’re in sales. I am in sales. We belong in the same box.

Oh, you’re a mom. I am a mom. We belong in the same box.

Oh, you’re into fitness. I am into fitness. We belong in the same box.

Oh, you’re a guy. I am a guy. We belong in the same box.

We use these boxes to see who is ‘friendly’ to us. Our allies. People that belong in our box. Or, see who could be ‘threatening’ to us. Our enemies. People that do not belong to our box.

The moment we say the word feminist, people start to question whether they belong in that box or whether they like people in that box – or importantly, who labelled that box?

I’ve personally seen people struggle with placing themselves in the feminist box.

Citing nuanced differences, such as, “feminism as feminism, or, feminism as feminism is today?” Usually, associated with body language expressing confusion, hesitation, and defensiveness.

Basically, they’re part of the «feminism is good» box. But, they don’t like the other boxes. The other boxes that are labeled as feminism, but are in fact not.

Which is fair. Or, is it?

Let’s explore the different boxes discussed.

Feminism is good box

Believes that females are entitled to the right to safety, security, education, work and self-autonomy.

Feminism is bad box

Believes that the advancement of feminism will lead to the eradication of males (?).

The angry feminist box

Believes that males ought to suffer for all pain they’ve inflicted on females.

Stuck in the 1960s box

Believes that females should fully return to domestic work and the eradication of female work.

Feminism is bad box

Believes that the advancement of feminism will lead to the eradication of males (?).

The not-all-men box.

Believes that females are out to get males through false allegations and that the male is always* innocent.

The pick-me box.

Believes that hating feminism will lead to an increase in male preference and admiration.

The pick-her box.

Believes in only associating with females that agree with everything they say. Prefers young and inexperienced females.

Zero-sum game box.

Believes that granting females rights and protection will take away from male rights and protection.

Matriarchal anarchist box.

Believes in mental deprogramming of patriarchal values and the establishment of a mental matriarchy.

This letter is a reminder, that we ought to move towards the “Feminism is good” box. Or, perhaps, take it even further. And, step out of them – to ultimately realize that we’re actually all one. For instance, if the aliens were ever to arrive. They would categorize us all as human scum. The inferior being.

That, the world consists of boxes within boxes. Sub-groups found within groups. And, that its ok to step out of your current one and explore.

A reminder, that ultimately, we’re all in the box of humanity. And, we’re all entitled to a life with peace, security, dignity, and autonomy.

Importantly, our right to happiness. After all, it’s the ultimate right we’re all fighting for.

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Deena Al Jassasi

Building a mentally healthier tech tomorrow Brainz.Health. Creator of ‘The Guide To Hacking Your Psyche’: psychology, warfare + spirituality.